Wednesday, August 1, 2012

BlogHer... Here I come!

That is it. I am packed. I head out in approximately 12 hours to the world’s largest conference for women in social media... and it just happens to be a little road trip with some pretty kick as friends as well! It is quite the event which brings thousands of women together to learn, discuss, inspire and connect with each other. We will be able to here keynote speeches from Katie Couric, Martha Stewart... even President Obama will be addressing us via satellite.

Did I mention it is also in NYC? I always love a good trip to NYC. There is so much to do and see and adventures to be had.

But I am a sad excuse for a blogger... a BlogHer...

I did not engage in any of the pre-conference hysteria. No Facebook groups for me... no special Twitter hashtags... no endless hours of researching blogs... about blogs... about what to blog about Blogher.

Until one of my tripmates "invited" me to just take a peek at the Facebook group... just to get a gander at the "bat shit craziness".

Oh. My. God.

And, from what I have gathered, this is what I am apparently doing wrong thus far:

1. I am not bringing a concealed weapon to protect myself from the crime ridden streets of NYC.
2. I did not get a pedicure, manicure, hair cut/style/color/extensions, wax...
3. I did not buy a fanny pack.
4. I have not educated myself about nor purchased a Jesus toaster.
5. I have not purchased and packed my suitcase with at least 12 pairs of shoes for the 3 day conference.
6. I have not created a filing system, system of envelopes, system of labels... for... well, I do not even know what the hell those are to be created for.
7. I have not begged for, signed up for, berated people for invitations to parties. What parties? I have no freaking idea... but apparently there are an ass ton and everybody who is anybody gets invited to them (which is clearly not moi.)
8. I have not created and scheduled posts for every single day that I will be away (and thankfully I do not post that much anyway, so nobody will miss me.)
9. I did not buy a whole new wardrobe.
10. I did not get a special shot to fight off the cooties that I will apparently catch from walking the streets of NYC in my flip flops.
11. I did not plan NEARLY well enough...

BUT, this is what I am going to do:

1. Hang out with some of the most amazing, creative, intelligent women I know.
2. Hopefully meet some of the most amazing, creative, intelligent women that I have been stalking for years now.
3. Attend a session or two and learn a thing or two about something or other.
4. Hula hoop in Central Park.
5. Cheer on my crazy friends when they wake up for a 6am 5K!
6. Avoid any and all lady drama. No cattiness, no competition (let's be honest here... who am I competing against?), no mean girls allowed.
7. I am looking for the closest place to serve me a cold bottle of craft beer while all the other fancy ladies are drinking from their wine glasses or fruity umbrella drinks.
8. Enjoy every moment whether it be people watching, sleeping in a bed without a 3-year-olds foot in my rib, learning something new, exploring the city... there is so much for me to experience in the next few days... I really can't wait!

I will report back if I make it through the muggings, gangrene, eye gouging and hair spray clouds!

(Oh, and if you want to come introduce yourself... I am a bit hard to miss with the telltale marks on my right arm, see photo above!)


  1. Dang...a fanny-pack. We didn't go over that last night. Couple that with your BeDazzler and you'd have looked glorious.

    Have fun...

  2. This is hilarious, and so true haha

  3. you are doing it right. We are there to relax and have a great time with each other, not wow one another with our perfect cuticles and spanx-laden thighs!

  4. Your to do list looks much more like how I would approach things. Heck, I don't even have 12 pairs of shoes!

    (Except the beer....I just don't like beer...but I do like cider:)

    Hope you are having a blast hula hooping all over NYC!

  5. I love your to do list!! That is exactly what I would have done!! I like you already! :D I want to go to next years conference, are you going?