See that moustache... pretty bad, eh? Ok, that's not really the 'bad' (I mean it is bad in all possibly ways, but he only had it for Movember and it is now gone... thank my lucky stars!)
Now the real 'bad'...
Colb sat down one evening in front of the television, "Where is the remote?"
"I have no idea."
"How did you change the channels?"
"I walked over to the TV and pressed the 'Channel' buttons."
"Uggghhhh."
"Seriously, Colb? The tv is 5 feet away."
"But I have to go through ALL the channels to pick what I want."
"Really, all SIX of them?" (No cable literally gives us about 6 channels on our tv)
I watched him quietly as he moved his head from one side to the other... he was not willing to actually move his body to search for this remote any more than he was willing to stand and press a button on the tv.
I went to up to bed where he uncharacteristically quickly joined me, obviously devasted by this whole remote debacle.
As I descended the stairs the next morning, I discovered the tv WAS STILL ON! He could not even turn it off as he walked right by it when he exited the living room!
True story.
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
And the ugly:
I crossed Colby's path one morning as he was leaving for work. I looked curiously at each of the girls as I sniffed near them... "What is THAT smell?"
"What smell?" Colb asked.
"It smells like...." I walked closer to Colb... "Oh my God. You are not wearing..."
"What?"
"My SENSUAL lotion!"
It is my favorite lotion... and it is quite sensual. I do not wear it to work or to basketball practice... "Inspires heightened sensuality..."
"My skin was super dry. I needed moisturizer."
"Sooo, do you plan on going to work smelling like that?"
"Well, I can't very well wash it off now."
"Bwhahhahahha!"
Imagine when Colby walks up to some poor unsuspected coworker who smells my lotion that "puts love in the air" only to turn around and see... my HUSBAND!
Now that will be ugly.
Okay Jeff, and I are laughing so hard right now. I will have to ask him if he has any lotion next time I see him.
ReplyDeleteOK. I laughed out loud. Great post. The mustache is always a bad idea... for everyone... in any situation. Agreed.
ReplyDeleteThe lotion? hahahahahaha!
Ugh, Champ has a mustache/beard combo right now (you know, for the mildest winter EVER) and while I'm all for him doing as he pleases- it feels gross. Maybe he will shave soon too ;) Hey- gave you a little shout out on my blog today. Thanks for all your inspiration!
ReplyDeleteI think all staches are creepsville, but for a good cause can be tolerated. The lazy remote thing?? I think we've all been there with the spouse. My hubby won't even look for things before asking me. It's like I have a suprepower of knowing where everything is!
ReplyDeleteHahahaha brilliant!
ReplyDelete