Sunday, February 15, 2009

World's Worst Mom

Ariana had a fit the other day and the ensuing argument revealed what an awful mom I was. Which, of course, I then laid in bed that night and thought about to a point of insomnia. So, to make all the the other less-than-perfect moms out there feel better, here is a list of the things I have done/ do that make me an awful mom...
I have caught one of my children on fire. Well, ok, it was her blanket, not her. (Note to new parents: having a candle lit dinner with your new baby on the table in her car seat is not a good idea!) But, on the up side, we have always had fire extinguishers in our house since that incident.

I have seen 2 of the 3 children topple down a full flight of stairs (Acadia will not be allowed on the stairs until she is 12.)

It was on my watch when Annika swallowed a battery and spent the next week in and out of the ER and Boston Children's Hospital. (I was also the one who dug around for it when she finally passed it!)

I forgot to send Ariana to school with her Valentine's one year.

When Ariana was 7, I got caught in traffic and was not home to meet her when she got off the bus. I called her and said "I am 3 minutes away, sweetie, just lock the door and stay on the phone with me." I was home literally 3 minutes later but some weeks after that, a friend approached me, "If you ever need me to get Ariana off the bus, I am always available." "Huh? You live half an hour away," I told him. "Well, Ariana told me how you had to leave her alone for a few hours because you couldn't get home." Arrgghhhhh!!!

I never let my kids (or husband) have fruit roll-ups, twinkies, soda, etc. (Think: "But, MOM, you NEVER let me have fruit snacks! ALL the other kids have fruit snacks!)

I have sent my daughter to bed without dinner- only to later find a sheet marked "Number of times I had to go to bed without dinner" with tally marks! Ok, that is the number of times I have said "You are going straight to bed, no dinner." ...only to call her back out to eat later.

I make my kids play outside... even in the... snow! (Gasp!) "But, MOM, it's snowing!"

When my kids fall asleep in the car, I leave them there... hey, they are contained and I have a few moments to rake/weed/sit on the steps and read a magazine... whatever, it's peaceful... if even for 10 minutes.

Anyone care to share what makes them a bad mom? I can't be the only one....


  1. how dare you call yourself the 'world's worst mom'.....shame on you....this house couldn't be happier and healthier; and we couldn't love you any more because of it

    then again, i never set anyone on fire....

  2. I think that my three children would argue with you on that one because they clearly have the worst mother in the world. Although I have never done the fire thing, I was once washing Jozie hair and the water became really hot and she ended up getting burned (not too bad, no blisters). And you can wait until their 2 to send them down the stairs, however out of 5 people that live here someone ALWAYS is falling on the stairs including Jeff, mostly Jozie but Jeff has taken a few diggers and he is an adult. I am also just as mean because I do not think that Oreos and wheat thins are lunch.

  3. I think you and I should never let our children get together.. it would be one hot battle to see which one of us takes the prize! Ok, I never set anyone on fire (good one!) but I have given one a black eye, missed the school bus a few times, AND FORGOT BIRTHDAY CUPCAKES AT SCHOOL! Yeah, thats a big one.

  4. Thank you for helping me get to 100! Im almost there!!! I think I will leave it up as my top post for one more day!!

  5. If you ask my daughter, I'm the worst mom because she's 12 and yet to have a cell phone!
    How dare I?

  6. These are great! I am apparently the worst mom because I don't let my son walk on teh coffee table. Oh and I also won't let him eat the dogs food. I'm horrible I know!
    Stopped by from McMommy's POW~

  7. Are you kidding me?! You are a perfect mom! Here's a BAD mom..I take care of a boy who's Mother would get drunk everynight and forget about where she left him. A Mom who thought that her kid was interfering with her social life, so she abandoned him and will cancel plans to see him because she doesn't feel like paying for gas money.
    This is the same boy who tells me that I would never make it as a mother in real-life because I am not mean enough. So kudos to you, Mommy.

    You love your children...that's all that matters at the end of the day.

  8. In an effort to bond with my daughter cooking, a favorite pass time, we discovered what seared hands look like and how terrible of a sound they make. Umm yea. Not a bonding experience we have undertaken again.

    Thank you for the great movie suggestions! You had a lot on there I actually haven't seen so awesome.

  9. Also you kind of made my day as a new commenter! love it.

  10. i am a bad mom cause I let my little girl eat Smart Food for breakfast. Some mornings I can't cope with the tantrums and I figure it does have fiber and some nutrients.

  11. I think this post should have been titled: "World's Most NORMAL Mom!!"

    Cause you are SO not alone, I swear. :)

  12. by far you are not the worlds worst mom, your a mom and we do what happens as life happens!

  13. If my daughters were older, some of those same things would happen.

    And, you saw my post where my daughter pulled her dresser on herself? I think that says it all!

  14. that is the funniest about the tally sheet!!! now i won't be surprised if one day i find something like this with my oldest daughter... thanks for the heads up :)

  15. I StumbleUpon-ed a more recent article when this one caught my eye and I got distracted.
    There are so many times when I let them play video games when I should be spending time with them, although it seems pretty acceptable now.
    My favorite is when I have lost it sometime during the night trying to get them to bed. I barely give them a good night kiss and started stomping away when I hear, "Mom?" So many times I would swing around with my one eye twitching and growl, "What?!?!" Only to hear, "I love you."
    This has happened more than once and I always walk away promising to be a better mother.
    In the end I figure what doesn't kill them will make them stronger.;)